Me: "Hello. How are you?"
Myself: "'Hello'?! 'How are you?'?! What, are you obsessed with greetings or something?!"
Me: "Are you suggesting there's something wrong with having an obsession?"
Awkward silence.
Me: "Okay, I'll start the interview. I hear you recently found an unpleasant object you couldn't get rid of. What was that?"
Myself: "It was a big block that seemed to belong to a writer. During the time I had it, I seemed to just not be able to write."
Me: "But now you've gotten rid of it, I see."
Myself: "Yes I have."
Me: "Does it bother you that yes, you have?"
Myself: "You're not an automated therapist."
Me: "Sorry."
Myself: "So, what hobbies do you have."
Me: "Wait, I was asking the questions!"
Myself: "It doesn't really matter, does it? I mean, we're the same person."
Me: "Then why are there two different types of handwriting?"
Myself: "Well, I have two different hands, don't I?"
[Photo of the original; "Myself" is my usual left-handed handwriting.]
Me: "I suppose."
Me: "Wait, isn't switching handedness supposed to cause stuttering?"
Myself: "N-n-n-no, of c-c-c-course n-n-not! W-w-w-why would it do that?"