The Elitist Snob

Hi, this is me, and I'm so special! You know, there's this kid at my school—he's such a jerk. Always complains about Creative Writing. Like there's something wrong with that subject. Personally, I think Creative Writing is the best subject. You get to make up a character who's perfect, like myself, and then you get to add your least favorite people—ugly people, for example. Then of course your perfect person will win, and the ugly person will have something bad happen to her. As it should be, of course. Darn, I wish real life were like that. I wish that my classmates would finally recognize that I'm the richest, smartest, prettiest, perfectest person in the world. I mean—I got into this $30,000 school on scholarship; the rest of the students had to pay. Oh well, so much better for me. As I was saying—this one kid, jerk, once told me this really long story about how he really hated writing, and somehow got talking about "idiot" environmentalists who recycle. He called us "idiots"! Who does he think he is?! Obviously, if it weren't for environmentalists like me, we would have much more pollution. Thank goodness I was born, how else could those trees have been saved?! Anyways, so he just talked on and on like that for fifteen minutes, then I just told him to shut up.