# Random

"Do your story ideas tend to be somewhat random?" asked a random person.

"Well, look at yourself", I said. The random person clearly was random.

"Monkey trochee", said the random person.

"See, random. Well... except not."

"Ninja pirate?"

"See, humans can't really do randomness... ", I said.

"Why are we just having a random dialogue?" asked the random person. "Shouldn't we be doing something?"

We went to the beach and built sandcastles. I noticed that random person's sandcastle had numbers all over it.

"Yes", said the random person.

"But... they're so ordered!" I said, as I noticed the numbers. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 1, 0, 1, 1, 1, 2, and so on.

"Well, at least it's a normal number", said the random person.

"Have any numbers been proven to be normal that are random?"

"Uh, randomness isn't a property of the number", said the random person.

"Then what are you?"

"Not a number."

"Oh, right", I said.

We went home.

"Wait, we live at the same place?" said the random person.

"Uh, I guess", I said.

"Uh, yes."

"Then why not give me a million dollars?" asked the random person.

I gave the random person a million dollars, and gave a million dollars to myself. Then I gave a million dollars to everyone in the world and the economy collapsed.

"Wait, wouldn't that change stuff? For people with much less than a million dollars, differences that were once significant have become negligible", said the random person.

"Uh, of course. But I can't be bothered to figure out what that is, and even if I could I don't know much about economics."

Fifteen minutes later, I was at my computer, writing a story.

"A random story?" asked the random person.

"Yes, of course", I said.

"A random person."

"Recursion? Really? Hey, how come Ripeto isn't in anything recursive? It seems like recursion and repeating sort of go together... at least, they both start with re."

"Because I said that I wasn't going to use zem again."

"But you didn't keep that promise, now, did you?" said the random person.

"Where?" I asked. "I don't remember which story."

"Objection!", said the random person. "I have the story right here. It's... The Chocolate Rain."

"How does that relate to Ripeto, and since when are you Phoenix Wright?" I noticed at that point, five exclamation marks floating in the air; one of them poofed away.

"Uh... I mean, if I'm random, then sometimes I'm going to be the same as existing things. And every possible variation on those existing things."